Inmate breaks out of jail, goes shopping

Dustin Scarbrough was awaiting trial for armed robbery in the Roane County, Tenn., jail when he broke out by climbing through a damaged fence in the jail’s recreation yard.

But he didn’t plan to stay out. Authorities say he instead went shopping.

“I was at the block by the Kingston Courthouse and as I drove by I witnessed a white male run off the front steps heading towards the jail. It kind of caught my attention so I watched him for another second or so and when I did he got to the corner and he crouched over,’ says Sergeant Wes Stooksbury, from the Kingston Police Department. . . .

“As he ran between the air conditioning unit and the bail bondsman’s office I ran between the jail and the air conditioning unit. They are close together in order to cut him off I went down between those two buildings and got behind the first buildings on the left and waited for him to come around. When he did I caught him there just behind the jail rec-yard,’ explains Sgt. Stooksbury.

The Sergeant says he found on Scarbrough a package containing clothes, liquor, several prescription pills a substance believed to be crack cocaine and evidence that Scarbrough isn’t a big fan of jail food.

“Four McDonalds Hamburgers,’ says Sgt. Stooksbury. — WVLT

That’s right, he didn’t like the jail food, and really needed a drink. You’d think after escaping he’d go somewhere other than back to the jail, but… Dustin Scarbrough is today’s Stupid Person of the Day.

Christmas Eve arrested

Christmas Eve Hall, 19, of Pasadena, Texas, was arrested last week after allegedly trying to make it look like her car was stolen.

Police received a notification of suspicious activity after witness two men pushing a vehicle on school property into a bicycle rack. The witness also reported seeing one of the men break the rear window out of the vehicle with a crow bar.

An officer went to where the car was abandoned and another officer went to the registered owner of the vehicle. A red vehicle matching the description given by the witness arrived at the address where Hall was giving a report to the officer. The officer told Hall the punishment of filing a false report, but Hall continued telling the officer her vehicle had been stolen.

After getting information from Hall, the officer talked to the men in the vehicle. One of the men admitted to pushing the car and breaking the window to make it appear it had been stolen, according to the report.

The district attorney’s office accepted charges of filing a false report to a police officer, a Class B misdemeanor.

The car was impounded by police. — Pasadena Citizen

It seems to have been some sort of insurance fraud attempt. And Christmas Eve becomes today’s Stupid Person of the Day.

Couple poisons, kills their own infant

Mardala Derival and Mackenson Dantus, of Fort Lauderdale, Fla., were arrested in Trenton, N.J., Thursday, after being accused of poisoning their three-month-old baby to death with alcohol.

Detectives with the Broward Sheriff’s Office convinced a couple accused of feeding their 3-month old baby a lethal dose of vodka to surrender to New Jersey authorities Thursday, officials said. . . .

“We spoke to them for an extended period of time and convinced them that they needed to turn themselves in,’ said Elizabeth Calzadilla-Fiallo, a Broward sheriff’s spokeswoman. “Our fugitive squad detectives did a good job of convincing them that this was the best thing for everyone involved.’

The couple are accused of feeding their daughter, Makeisha Dantus, a mixture of formula, water, sugar and vodka in an attempt to quiet her on Feb. 13, 2004. The infant’s blood alcohol level was 0.47 percent, according to the Broward County Medical Examiner’s office. The legal limit for drivers in Florida is 0.08 percent.

The couple, who authorities said are Haitian immigrants, were not charged until Oct. 28, 2005. By that time, they had disappeared from Florida. Dantus told Trenton authorities that he and Derival had been staying with relatives in the city. — New York Newsday

While feeding babies very small amounts of alcohol is considered a way to “quiet crying babies’ in some cultures, killing your own baby by using far too much definitely qualifies you for Stupid Person of the Day.

“I couldn’t get a real woman, so I got a dummy’

Michael James Plentyhorse, 18, of Sioux Falls, S.D., was arrested Monday, Nov. 14, after being found half-naked lying next to a female mannequin by a security guard at the Washington Pavilion of Arts and Sciences.

The guard observed Plentyhorse with his pants and underclothing down and lying next to the half-naked female mannequin, a police report states.

“There was inappropriate activity between him and the mannequin. That’s the only way I know how to put it,’ Sioux Falls police officer Loren McManus said.

Security staff at the Pavilion say they have noticed the same mannequin has previously been found undressed on several occasions, McManus said. — Argus Leader

You are a dummy. It’s not that hard to have a relationship with a real live human being, assuming you’ve developed the necessary social skills. (But that can take a lot of extra time for some people.) Michael James Plentyhorse is today’s Stupid Person of the Day.

Counterfeiters send jammed printer for repair

It seems there are some very stupid criminals out there. They sent the printer they were using to print counterfeit notes in for repair because it was jammed. They forgot to remove the counterfeit bills that were jamming it first though!

Arizona authorities this week charged suspected members of a criminal ring thought responsible for 10 per cent of all fake money in the state after some members sent a printer, jammed with counterfeit bills, out for repair.

A three-month investigation by the U.S. Secret Service and the local sheriff’s office nabbed 10 suspects for crimes including forgery, weapons violations and drug charges, according to the Southwest Valley Republic. The ring of counterfeiters allegedly included two Wal-Mart cashiers who accepted the fake bills as payment for big-ticket items in order to put the faux money into circulation. The suspects would then go to a different Wal-Mart and return the items for cash, according to the news report. — SecurityFocus

[Editor’s note: While in this case the idiots left counterfeit currency in the printer when they sent it out for repair, manufacturers of color laser printers embed tracking codes onto every printed page, so that a counterfeit bill can be tracked back to the printer that produced it.]

Woman wants to marry man who shot her

Tina Marie Stebbins, of San Bernardino, Calif., said in a letter Monday that she still plans to marry Christian Leroy Lindblad, 37, who shot her and held her hostage for six days in his family’s garage. Lindblad pleaded guilty to attempted murder and was sentenced to 20 years in prison in 2002.

“I love Christian today as deeply as I loved him before this awful thing happened to us,’ Stebbins wrote in a victim impact statement. “We are soul mates.’

She added: “I want to tell you all that I have forgiven Christian. And I pray that Christian has forgiven me for failing him when he needed me most.’

The incident occurred at the Big Bear City home the couple shared with Lindblad’s parents. Lindblad and Stebbins had a history of domestic violence and substance abuse, according to a sentencing report. It also said Lindblad had been drinking at the time of the shooting.

Lindblad and his parents, Robert and Shirley Lindblad, tried to cover up the shooting by treating Stebbins with home remedies, according to a San Bernardino County Sheriff’s report. They also threatened her young sons and her family, the report said. — Associated Press

For wanting to get back together with this scum of the earth, Tina Marie Stebbins wins today’s Stupid Person of the Day award. But I must give an honorable mention to both of Lindblad’s parents, who tried to help him cover up his crime. They both pleaded guilty to being an accessory.

Death row escapee drinks his way back to jail

Charles Victor Thompson, 35, who had been sentenced to death in Texas, escaped from custody last Thursday by somehow getting hold of civilian clothes and a fake ID of the Texas Attorney General’s office. U.S. marshals captured him today near a liquor store in Shreveport, La., primarily because he couldn’t stop drinking.

U.S. Marshals Service spokeswoman Marianne Matus said Thompson was too drunk to be questioned about his escape and how he got to Shreveport, which is the near the border with northeastern Texas.

“He was pretty intoxicated. He was pretty impaired,’ said Lt. John Martin of Harris County Sheriff’s Office in Houston. — Reuters

If you’ve escaped from prison, the last thing you want to do is draw attention to yourself, and wandering around the streets blasted is a great way to get yourself caught. Charles Victor Thompson, therefore, is today’s Stupid Person of the Day.

Hurricane evacuees murder woman who helped them

Jimmy Hoang Le, 18, Stephanie Jacobo 18, both of Beaumont, Texas, and Roosevelt Smith Jr., 43, of Louisiana, were charged with capital murder Saturday in the robbery and strangulation death at her home of Betty Blair, 77, of Pasadena, Texas.

“It appears that those that she tried to help were the ones that murdered her,’ said Pasadena Police Department spokesman Vance Mitchell. The three lived together in an apartment in the 900 block of Randall in Pasadena, Mitchell said.

They were arrested Friday night at the toll booth at Beltway 8 and Westheimer, driving Blair’s tan 2000 Buick, in which some of her belongings were found. Jacobo’s 10-month-old boy, was also in the car, and is now with “appropriate relatives,’ said Gwen Carter, a spokeswoman for the Department of Family and Protective Services.

The car was located through OnStar, an onboard electronic tracking system. . . .

The three suspects were the second group of evacuees Blair had helped after Hurricane Katrina, according to her neighbor and fellow parishioner Mary Titus. — Houston Chronicle

Talk about ungrateful. Not to mention stupid. I thought everybody knew OnStar could locate your vehicle.

Mom puts 2-year-old on wrong tracks

A woman in Marina, Calif., put her 2 year old son onto railroad tracks in an apparent attempt to kill the toddler, but the attempt failed when the train stopped about 25 feet short.

Then she did it again.

Officers arrested the woman, 22, on suspicion of attempted murder and child endangerment. The boy was placed into protective custody.

Trolley security guards first saw the woman and child standing on the tracks at Front Street and Harbor Drive about 7:20 p.m. as a freight train approached slowly, San Diego police Lt. Shelley Zimmerman said.

The train engineer saw the pair and was able to stop within 25 feet of the them. He and the security guard told the woman to get off the tracks and she did, taking the boy with her, Zimmerman said.

But about 15 minutes later, as another slow-speed train neared the intersection, a security guard saw the woman push the boy onto the tracks, Zimmerman said. Again the train engineer stopped 25 feet short of hitting the boy. — San Diego Union-Tribune

Police had not released the name of today’s Stupid Person of the Day as they weren’t sure of her identity. She carried no identification.

Man steals limousine with 15 people in it

Here’s a hint to you would-be car thieves: Steal a car which isn’t full of people.

A Hummer limo filled with people celebrating a birthday party turned into a wild ride early Sunday after a man attempted to steal it, San Antonio Police said. What the suspect did not realize was there were 15 people in the back of the limo.

Twenty-one-year-old Noe Ochoa was arrested, police said. He was held down by people in the limo until officers arrived. . . .

“The Hummer starts to move and everybody’s like, ‘What’s going on?” Kenneth Thornton said. His friends had rented the limo for Kenneth’s 28th birthday.

The limo driver was apparently in the back talking to one of the 15 the passengers when Ochoa jumped in to the Hummer, police said.

Thorton crawled through the privacy window to stop the suspected carjacker.

“I flip the park on the Hummer, and it screeches us to a halt,’ Thorton said. “Then, I put him in a choke hold until they can get out and pull him out.’ — WOAI

Ochoa, today’s Stupid Person of the Day, said he stole the limo because his friends ditched him and he needed a ride.